PSoTD

8 AM on Christmas Eve Day, I'm the only one awake and out of bed.

Tomorrow the kids will be awake by 6:30

Friday the kids will be asleep still at 8 AM

One of the things Christmas trains children for is sleeping anxiety.

Grandmother, Mother and Daughter sitting at breakfast table. Father and son also, but they're not part of this discussion.

Mother: You know, next year we should take Cee (daughter) to the Nutcracker ballet.

Grandmother: That's a wonderful idea!

Daughter: Nooooo!!!!!

Our daughter was less than a year old - still crawling, climbing to her feet but not yet walking - when MMMBop by Hanson came out. It was a catchy bubblegum tune, on the radio a lot of the time, and after a little bit we realized that she liked that song. In fact, she liked it so much that we could sing it to her when she was upset, or when we wanted her to go to sleep, and she would calm down to it and at night or nap time she would go to sleep in our arms. It was gold to us.

One time my old boss, Rick, was out from Sacramento, and we had him over for dinner. By that time I had videotaped MMMBop as well, since we knew it gathered her attention, and we didn't have to sing it everytime, if we needed the tune. We were telling Rick about it, and he thought it was funny, so we gave him a demonstration. We sat our daughter on one side of our family room, set the tape up to play, and walked to the other side of the room. Of course, she wanted to be with us, so she started to crawl quickly to us, when the song kicked in on the television. She stopped immediately and looked at the TV, cocked her head, then crawled to it. She pulled herself up on our old entertainment center, and then proceeded to do the baby dance. We've all seen the baby dance - they're on their two feet, mostly bopping up and down in an effort to find some sort of musical rythym I guess, and it doesn't sync up to the beat but it's still as cute as anything. And she was. I have her, and MMMBop, on video somewhere.

There are songs that I really like, and then there are songs like MMMBop, which have an extrinsic value that far overwhelms any value the song may musically provide. It's a catchy song, but our daughter made it perhaps the most memorable song of the 1990s for us. Even to this day, she likes it, although she's embarrassed by the story.

We were visiting some good friends in our neighborhood, and the husband said "Christmas this year is going to be a bit more modest here," referring to the number and scope of gifts for everyone, including the kids.

We agreed, and very likely it's a sentiment being felt in millions of homes this year. And it isn't about fear about the economy, or a kneejerk reaction to the stock market, or at least just that, but it seems to me to be an "awakening from slumber" moment for many of us.

For years we were pulled in deeper by the undercurrent of Christmas capitalism, pushed by the desire for greater and more expensive electronics and sports equipment and other items because everyone else was going in a bit deeper as well. Our kids deserve this, because their friends have this, and because their friends have this, our kids want this, and Christmas was there to satisfy the want.

And it wasn't just the kids, but us as well, wanting more than we needed simply because we felt the pull and didn't feel any desire to resist. There was almost a sense that we deserved it.

Funny thing about an economic crisis, though, is it makes you think about the reasoning of what you're doing as you consider the results as well.

I wonder if that reasoning is going to make a big change in the future of Christmas in families around the country. If families have a more modestly priced Christmas, and this Christmas is seen as just as enjoyable and rewarding for families as previous Christmases, then what is the value of spending that additional $500 or $1000 or $2000 dollars on gifts? Especially when compared to things that could be done with that money for the family in the future?

We'll see what happens this year, but hefty-price Christmas may be about to get the same kind of review from the American family that the SUV has received the past few years - and a similar buying decision for the future.

Duck Soup was a mixed result with our kids. They did really like the peanut vendor scenes, particularly the first one with the hat changes, and we ALL got a big belly laugh when Groucho had the pitcher stuck on his head, asked for help, and they drew his face on the vase. I think they liked it more than they understood, because between the comments that it was black and white and "why did he do that" there were some good laughs, particularly from our 8 year old. But I think the difference in technology and technique between the 1930s and now is a pretty big jump at their ages to bypass.

Oh, and they hated the songs.

Here's that scene with the pitcher.

There's a list of retail stores going out of business with a general bit of advice that seems to be going viral: don't give gift cards for Christmas this year.

Here's a bunch of famous folks my wife joins in turning 41 this year - of course, she just reaches it today.

Kinda strange to think that Kurt Cobain would have been that age this year.

Both kids are now registered in the Cumberland Valley Youth Basketball Association. Evaluations are in late October, practices start pretty soon after that. Basketball season around our house is a very busy time, but a fun time - I really enjoy it.

Now that we have two kids in this league, I've had to make a decision, and this year I'll coach our oldest and assistant coach the youngest. Games and practices will conflict and the head coach really should be there unless of an emergency - that's the commitment you make to the kids on the team, and their parents.

The sad part of that is that this is likely to be my last year of head coaching hoops for the oldest. She and I have already discussed it, and the three of us (including the youngest) are in agreement - next year she'll need a different coach, hopefully someone who can bring coaching and kid talents to the table that I don't, and I'll head coach his team as well.

Our youngest turned 8 on Sunday, and there's a bit of a procedure that comes with that - the removal of the child car seats. My wife commented on Sunday morning that it was kind of sad, it was one of the last things left of this age of his toddlerhood, and since he's our youngest and we are not planning for any more children, it's the last of this stage for us as well. I guess it is kind of sad, but frankly, I like the flexibility of my car WITHOUT car seats too, since we find ourselves sometimes driving more than just our kids to places, and the car seat took up a bit of space.

My wife is likely to find it sad again in a few months as our oldest turns 12, because Pennsylvania state law allows a 12 year old to sit up front in the passenger seat and there will likely be many, many challenges about her sitting up front (instead of my regular copilot) on family trips in the future.

From our sixth-grade daughter after her second day of school this fall:

"I Love Middle School."

I think this post does nibble around the juicy heart of a cultural change - how does the "marriage dance" change in an ubiquitous Google world? < Use Homer Simpson Voice In Your Mind While Reading > Plus, it's funny because I know them. And it's true. IT'S TRUE! < /Use Homer Simpson Voice In Your Mind While Reading >

I guess I've never really understood the appeal of podcasting for bloggers anyway. Don't want to bother making them, don't want to bother listening to them. I guess I'm a bad member of the blogging community.

Aha, I'm not alone.

We have three families that we're looking to find a centralized location for a week vacation next year, with things to do for five kids ranging in age from 8 to 15. Got something to say about this place on Lake Michigan? I'd like to read it. It's getting some play in the news, but I have to admit that the Saugatuck vacation web sites really don't sell it that well.

Times touts us as top spot
Waterlogged, mosquito-bit, but still the best of times
The $4.49-a-Gallon Vacation
A weekend getaway in western Michigan

Driving with the 7 year old yesterday. I told him to look at the cars we were passing by going down different streets, because I'm thinking of replacing the Ford Escape with something with better gas mileage. The light went on for him:

"You should go on Vehix.com then. It's free!"

I had to explain that searching Vehix.com was free, not the cars for sale there.

Oh, not as cool then.

Our daughter and her friends are working on building a fort. Early progress so far:

There were two forts I remember building when I was a kid - one was in Muncie with supply delivery flats, and the other was an underground fort we dug out in California and put a gigantic piece of plywood over the top, except for the entrance. You can do that in California, since it doesn't rain for about 7 months.

I'm not sure if it's genetic coding or learned behavior, but I have found that I'm following a habit of my Dad's. When I was a kid, I didn't really participate in his regular practice but now I find myself doing so.

There's a time in the evening in the longer daylight days, not quite sundown but getting near, after dinner, when we usually have a relative stillness in our house. The kids are usually eating a snack and watching some television show or reading or playing on X-Box intently, part of the wind-down before bedtime. My wife is doing things to prep for going to work for the next day. I, on the other hand, usually take the opportunity to slip outside and enjoy our backyard for a few minutes.

Actually, it's not all of our backyard. Because of our position on our street and the next cross-street, there are three backyards that run together, almost as one, that over the years have somewhat grown separately yet similar in appearance, almost as if a park landscaper had intended for the entire area to look the way it does. The yards are bordered by fences on one side, and homes on the other, but are wide enough and long enough to keep both out of main focus when looking at the yards. There's always an abundance of natural activity going on in the back, from insects (lightning bugs, cicadas, crickets, butterflies, damselflies, you name it, if it's local you might see it) to vertebrates. At dusk is a good time to see the bats come out and swoop between the trees, catching the bugs that are starting to lift from the grass as dark approaches.

Rarely, other than my family, do you see people at this time in the backyards.

My Dad, in Livermore and in Bakersfield, used to like to go in the backyard for 10-15 minutes and just enjoy whatever he was enjoying, quietly. I tend to think I have a far wealthier view to enjoy, but I've found myself doing the same thing. It's more than just relaxing, there's almost a soothing music of sound and visual, and often of smell, that combines to provide a useful "reset" for me. It's not something that is as describable as it is experienced, but I think you have to be open to it for it to happen, because for many years I was not.

The front yard actually doesn't cut it for me as a view unless it's a thunderstorm. Then, I can sit in the garage, and get a pretty good view of the storm rolling in and the lightning cracking around and the reaction of people as they hurry to get out of the weather. It's still not the same, but it's enjoyable.

For me, the backyard is somewhat of a place where I can rejuice my batteries. How about you?

I may have gone my whole life without really considering the definition of the term "nanosecond" except our 7-year-old finds the whole nanosecond measurement idea pretty fascinating. Like in, "how many nanoseconds will it take for us to get to Hersheypark?"

Our daughter goes to several week-long day camps in the summer - most of them are run by the local school district, and consist of a focus for a few hours each day on a particular subject. Last year she went to basketball, art, science, and chess camp. This year she has gone to two basketball camps, art, geocaching, and will go to a CSI camp later this summer.

Geocaching? So far it has proven to be the most popular camp to her this summer, other than basketball. The way we choose these camps, is that she chooses most of them, and then we choose one that we think might be fun and different, or at least mind-opening. She wasn't so hot on our selection of chess last year, and she was afraid that geocaching would be about as interesting. But she loved geocaching. Now the talk is about getting a handheld GPS navigation thingy, and she says this is a good family activity we can all do together. And there are lots and lots of caches - apparently over 2500 in the 17011 zip code alone.

I guess we made a better choice this year than last.

Every odd-numbered year, my two brothers' families and ours get together for a big family summer vacation. The selection process rotates, and this time it's my job to find the spot. So, I'm looking for input. I've narrowed it down to about 10 different places around the country, and by the end of this summer I need to have the place figured out. Have any suggestions?

One place we're considering is Banff/Lake Louise. Comments would be appreciated, if you've been there.

You can get it done if you really want to know what breeds of dog your pet is...

They share the same facial expression in the following examples:

Dog: Barking at a dog that is going by. I take her head and scratch her behind the ears to try to calm her down, and she's looking at me, but all the while is thinking about getting back to the door to check if she needs to bark some more.

Kids: Yelling at each other about almost anything. I take them and tell them they need to settle it without yelling, arguing is fine but name-calling and loud voices are not. They look at me nodding but all the while thinking about how they are going to tell me it's the other person's fault.

Wheels turning, ears just for show.

When you don't take responsibility for what you believe...

Anglo-americans (who are mostly christian) do not understand the concept that in Islam, as in Judaism, you are BORN into the religion (it is not a "choice"). In Judaism it is matrilineal, in Islam it is patrilineal.

One of the side benefits of having an Obama candidacy is that it gets this discussion of religion out on the table. Who determines your faith and your beliefs - you, or your parents?

The above simplistic review of religion categorizes it as an all or nothing question. I just can't see it that way. In the end, each individual has the responsibility of accepting or declining even the tiniest article within a belief structure, regardless of what their parents say. Period. Some religious cultures try to take that option away from the individual with the idea that a person is "born into" a religion.

But that is part of the faith's structure, and each individual has the option to accept or reject it. Even if most accept it, that does not mean that the option isn't there. Even if the religious culture demeans the individual for rejecting it, that doesn't mean the option is there. If a child is born of Jewish parents, who then immediately put the child up for adoption, and the child is adopted by Christian parents who raise the child as Christian - what is that child? When the child decides, as she grows up, that she accepts Buddhism as her faith, what is that person?

In other words - faith is not genetic regardless of what religious conventions may push. And it's time this country start getting their heads around this a bit more.

Every odd-numbered year, my two brothers' families and ours get together for a big family summer vacation. The selection process rotates, and this time it's my job to find the spot. So, I'm looking for input. I've narrowed it down to about 10 different places around the country, and by the end of this summer I need to have the place figured out. Have any suggestions?

So... who has vacationed in Vermont? None of us have - three families, five kids between 8 and 15, and we're looking at various places in the U.S. for vacation in 2009. Sell me on Vermont.

Every odd-numbered year, my two brothers' families and ours get together for a big family summer vacation. The selection process rotates, and this time it's my job to find the spot. So, I'm looking for input. I've narrowed it down to about 10 different places around the country, and by the end of this summer I need to have the place figured out. Have any suggestions?

One of the places I'm looking at is the Ozark Mountains region. 11 or 12 people total, 5 kids ranging from 8 to 15. Anyone have any experiences vacationing there they want to share?

Every odd-numbered year, my two brothers' families and ours get together for a big family summer vacation. The selection process rotates, and this time it's my job to find the spot. So, I'm looking for input. I've narrowed it down to about 10 different places around the country, and by the end of this summer I need to have the place figured out. Have any suggestions?

One of the places I'm looking at is Mackinac Island. There will be 6 adults, all in their 40s, and 5 kids, from 8 to 14. I'm a little afraid this place will be lacking in the kid interest department, but feel free to convince me otherwise.

I think I'm going to go 2 for 2 on the baseball front with our kids. I, having been raised in a household of sports fanship, of playing organized baseball until late teens, had been a bit concerned. Was baseball going to be too boring to our kids?

Our daughter proved it not to be for herself, at least at this point. She loves the big league ballpark experience. She loves playing softball. She'll play catch if you ask. She seems to be... invested, at least as much as a 5th grader can be.

But after one year of tee-ball, the youngest wasn't so sold. After last season, he told me he didn't want to play baseball, that he had "already learned it". I explained that he was going to play SOME spring sport, and it was probably a choice between baseball and soccer.

Okay, soccer.

So I explained a bit further - you run a lot in soccer. A LOT.

Okay, baseball.

So, he's now in his second season, and this year, he's into it. The coach gives baseball cards out to the kids who make outs in the field. He's not a bad fielder for his age, so he's been loving that, and I'm enjoying his reading of the cards on the way home. Are 89 BBs good? This guy had 89 in the BBs column. Is that good?

Is he a pitcher or a hitter?

He plays outfield.

That's pretty good, I explain.

He now likes playing catch, just about anytime. Game days he wants to put his uniform on. He keeps asking to do it, usually ends up with it on at least a half hour before we need to go. Then he asks if he should put his cleats on. Over and over and over. He's ready to go.

It's all cool. He wants to play the game, and that feels good to me.

Somehow, as a Bears fan, I am raising a Green Bay Packers fan, and even more unfortunately, apparently I'm going to be destined to see this painted on his bedroom wall soon.

Your spouse may discover you've been reading this blog.

Mothers posing naked for calendars appears to be fading in popularity...

Women in a Spanish village who posed almost naked for a calendar they hoped would fund a leisure centre for their children have been left with huge debts after they failed to sell enough copies.

"It was an erotic calendar by the firemen of Bilbao that gave us the idea," one of the women, Rosa Garin, told AFP Thursday by telephone from the village of Serradilla del Arroyo in western Spain.

The seven mothers took the photographs themselves, posing virtually nude in the local swimming pool, the tourist office and the bakery last November.

But only 1,500 of the 7,000 copies of the 2008 calendar were sold, at five euros each, and they are now in debt to the printer, who is threatening to take them to court claiming 18,000 euros (29,000 dollars) in damages and interest.

If pizza lasts two whole days in our refrigerator at our house, that's bad pizza. We've now had several pieces saved in our refrigerator for three days from a store-bought pizza - I can't say what kind it is because I didn't cook it, and we don't remember what we bought - and nobody wants to touch it. Unheard of around these parts.

I do remember that it cost $3 on sale at Giant, so I guess I won't be buying any more $3 frozen pizzas.

I'm a cold pizza fan. I think Christine Lavin was on the right track. Our son would eat pizza for all three meals each day if we let him. There's no way it should still be in our fridge - it's gonna get tossed.

I would have hoped that our nation was teaching people to be more responsible than to intentionally provide their underage kids with alcohol.

Apparently, I would have been wrong.

The overwhelming message from panelists at the Town Hall meeting on underage drinking Wednesday was that parents have proven to be the most common source for kids having access to alcohol.

The first speaker from the panel was a high school student who began drinking when she was 12 years old.

“I went with a friend to her parents cabin, and they let us have the alcohol. They didn’t have a problem with it, so I thought, ‘OK, it’s not that big of a deal.’ We went to parties and we mostly got the alcohol from parents,” said Jessie, whose last name is withheld.

Jessie went on to say, looking back, she couldn’t believe that so many of the parents didn’t try and prevent it.

This is just sad, and is just another reason why parents ought to know the parents of their kids' best friends.

I work at home. There's a lot of upside to it - flexibility to be with the kids when they need me, a lot cheaper costs on commuting and office clothes, etc. There's some downside as well - it can get lonely working by yourself, and you have to set up routines that put you around people for conversation and comradery, even if that's the coffee shop or the YMCA. Like any other work environment, there are times when I strongly value the benefits, and times when I am unhappy with the limitations.

One of the things that comes from working out of your house is that some neighbors seem to think that since you're around, you're not doing anything, or much of importance, anyways. The importance part might be true, except this is how I make my living, so it's important to us.

True story from a few days ago - the doorbell rings, and I can see it's one of my neighbors as I come down the stairs. I answer the door.

"What are you doing?" he asks.

"Working," I answer.

"Do you have five minutes?" he asks.

This is a trick question. Interruptions are never for five minutes, and when I'm in the middle of a job, it's some work to come back after a lengthy break and figure out where I am on it.

"Not really, I'm kinda busy. What's up?" I replied.

And then I found out. Our neighborhood ordered a porta-potty for one of our neighborhood parks for the next six months, it makes it easier for neighbors to have events there with a bathroom facility. It was delivered yesterday, and apparently in the wrong place in the park. This neighbor wanted me to go help him move the porta-potty to the correct place. Like, now. Ha ha ha. It's not a big job, but it's not my job, and my job needs me to work at it at that time.

"C'mon, that's the company's job. Call them up and tell them to place it where we requested it, that was part of the deal. We don't need to do this, that's their job, that's what we're paying them for," I told him. He said okay, and went on his way.

Yeaaarrrgh. I don't know, it just struck me as funny, that somehow I'm the guy he thought of to move a porta-potty in the middle of a work day. I'm going to have to do some reputation building, I think.

Well, our daughter's basketball season ended yesterday with a tournament at Mount Saint Mary's College in Maryland. Our 5th and 6th grade girls played as tough as they could, winning the first game before running into much taller competition.

It's a long season even as a rec coach, and I'm surprised to admit that I'm ready for it to have ended now. Our daughter has already started softball practice, and our son starts baseball practice on Monday, and I'm ready for the change in sports seasons.

BTW, if you're ever looking for a place to eat at when in Emmittsburg, I can recommend Dave & Jane's Crab House. We only got sandwiches there, but for the price we received more food than we could finish. If we're at this tournament again next year we'll go back.

Funny... I don't think my wife is part of that 15%. I smell carrots.

"Note to dads...What gets us in the mood:"

1. Foreplay 45%
2. Romantic gestures, like flowers and holding hands 29%
3. Choreplay (i.e., Dad chipping in around the house) 15%
4. A glass of wine 11%

You're like me, a full-sized cart person, having to go down every aisle, looking at the long list of items compiled.

You find yourself in the packaged food aisles. You look at the packages. Hey, prices haven't really changed. But wait a minute, that box is smaller. There's only 12 cookies in this container? Does this salad dressing really have an eye dropper to distribute the sauce?

The kids keep getting bigger, eating more. The packages keep getting smaller. Oh, except over there in dairy, and in packaged meat. There they get bigger - no, we don't want you buying 10 ounces of colby cheese, you have to buy 16 ounces. Eggs? You really can't buy 6 any more, you'll have to buy 12 or 24. Sorry. That's just the way it is.

What games they play with us. The packaged food doesn't expire for a long, long, long time so the contents are small, you'll be back to buy next week. The expirables, such as dairy, they maximize your weekly purchase, because it isn't going to last that long in your refrigerator, anyways. And in both times, every time a packaging size changes, there's a price increase. We know it, they know it, they just try to hide it a little by changing the quantity.

And we mull around the aisles and just take it. What can we do? Everyone in the supply chain is in the game - the grocery, the distributors, the manufacturers. We have to figure out something better to do, as consumers, than walk around with glazed eyes in the grocery, remembering the old days when ice cream came in half gallons instead of 1.75 quarts.